Monday, November 14, 2005

Braindead: The Crabcake Files

What are YOU staring at?
Okay it's not the best but I never said that the blog was only about the good... it'll probably include the bad and the ugly too.


I'm still not sure why it turned out so well even if I flubbed on so many parts of the recipe. In my haste to feed the growling tummy of His Froginess I mentally deleted many words in a recipe I pronounced the recipe to use up the three cold whole crabs lovingly donated by Surrogate Sister. I blithely went ahead and had to play by ear so many parts that it was a wonder it worked at all. but it was pronounced "a keeper" by the frog. He he he... I wonder if he'll still like it when I make it the proper way.

I started with excising the meat from the crab legs. HRH Frog helped. Thank god. Those little buggers have it right. Skeletons should go on the outside. They can be so hard to break if you have nothing resembling a nutcracker or its ilk. Then realized I didn't have enough meat. Blessings... I still have two cans of crab in the cupboard... phew. Blend in food processor... then read that the meat should remain chunky. Damn! Too late... Mince onions and celery. Cook in olive oil. Feel pretty superior again. Add cooked bits to crab meat. Add bread crumbs... Add parsley... Add chi... oh no... no chives! rush to use pathetic left over green onions in fridge... okay.. could be worse... still feel superior. Add mayo... mayo? what mayo? There's no reference to it in ingredient list! Thank go I have some ... Add to mix. Then I read: After forming crab cakes from scant 1/3 cup, chill for 1 hour. ACK! That can't happen! Why didn't I read this before? The roar of Frog tummy denotes no way to back out of this one gracefully... Fake it and dip cakes in flour, egg... err.. damn.. too soft! Bread crumbs.. Reform in hand. Phew... sticking together... Repeat again while oil heating up. Add moist cakes. Fail to read MEDIUM heat required. La dee dah dee dah... What do you mean it's ready to flip, Frog? It's not... oh crap! Flip them in the pan. Rush to finish others while the Frog happily flips away the next cakes, unknowing of my past half hour's stupidity. Plate them. Frog eats them and pronounces them so very good, so good to eat 6 of them. Thank my lucky stars.

Review old rule: do NOT, I repeat, do NOT choose a new recipe moments before your start it as brain comprehension levels at all time low before meals

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

God, how many times have I not seen the "chill for an hour" or "then bake 45 minutes more." Thanks to your grace and quick thinking though, sounds like all's well that ends well!

Deetsa said...

Thanks for the supportive comment. I hadn't really thought of it that way. That's why it's kinda nice to blog out thoughts. People put perspectives on things you didn't really consider. :)